election trauma.

kathyescobar crazy making, healing 1 Comment

“There are times when the heart, like the canary in the coal mine, breathes in the world’s toxicity and begins to die.” – Parker Palmer Over the weekend in the middle of the night someone stole our Black Lives Matter and Amendment T ( to take the slavery clause out of Colorado’s 13th amendment) yard signs, along with my next-door neighbor’s supporting two local Democrats. Several days ago I was waiting for an appointment and there was a TV on in the room (we don’t have regular …


as Christians, this shouldn’t be crazy.

kathyescobar church stuff, crazy making, down we go, incarnational 4 Comments

Let’s face it, friends. Christianity is certainly in an interesting season. The divides are great. The mass exodus from “going to church” continues. The number of men and women of all shapes and sizes and ages and experiences now unraveling in their faith keeps growing. The political party leap-frog game from Republican to Democrat or Independent is hotter than ever. I personally think it’s all a good thing. While some see it as a decline in our moral fabric or a complacency or rejection of the scriptures …


what we’re willing to live with.

kathyescobar church stuff, crazy making, down we go, equality, faith shifts, incarnational, injustice 16 Comments

I am so sick and saddened by the entire Trump Travesty. Seriously, it is so dignity stripping–that he is even a contender. That multiple Christian leaders have endorsed him. That the Republican party got behind him. That people are wrestling with their “hard choice” (#itsnotahardchoice). That we’d have a debate like that. I am glad things are tipping in a new direction and finally so many people are waking up, speaking out louder, withdrawing their support. However, please remember that up until this point many of …


no one more, no one less.

kathyescobar down we go, equality, incarnational, injustice 2 Comments

I just got back from a wild and crazy week-long adventure in Europe. We go every year on a standby trip to somewhere fun with our other friends who also work for United Airlines. This year we decided to go to Prague and Budapest. In a wonderful twist of events, our dear friends from Mercy Ministries–who live part time in Romania journeying alongside orphaned Roma (Gypsy) kids who are now young adults–invited us to come for a listening and learning weekend so we added that in, too. …


hope for the election (when we really want to lay on the floor and weep)

kathyescobar dreams, incarnational 0 Comments

There are only about 40 days left until the United States of America elects a new president.  Tonight is the first presidential debate and it’s sure to spark all kinds of media soundbites that will stir up an even greater frenzy. It’s bad out here, people. Tensions are high. People are scared. Confused. Angry. Sad. Worn out and exhausted by media-overload. There is a lot to be stirred up about: The polarization, the ugliness on both sides, the widening divides, the anger, the fear. But I …


our codependent relationship with God

kathyescobar church stuff, doesn't really go anywhere else, ex good christian women, healing, identity 10 Comments

Since I entered into recovery a big chunk of years ago, I came face to face with the realities of my co-dependency. As an adult child of an alcoholic, a 2 on the Enneagram, a pastor, and dyed-in-the-wool people pleaser, I pretty much hit codependency on all cylinders! The truth is most of us are codependent in some way, and it’s not just if we’re in relationship with addicts. All our control and addiction issues have their roots in codependency; it’s part of the human condition. Melody …


the great loneliness.

kathyescobar down we go, faith shifts 37 Comments

Recently I was at a very large gathering of men and women around the US and abroad who deeply care about many similar things I care about. I love much of their work. But as I sat in the opening session and listened to the music and the prayers and the language and the rah-rah I felt this overwhelming sense of deep, weird, in-my-bones loneliness. In the past, the “container” would have really resonated. I would have liked the songs and the wow and the excitement …


equality comes before mutuality.

kathyescobar dreams, equality, ex good christian women, incarnational, leadership 0 Comments

A long while back a Christian blogger wrote a thoughtful response to something I had written about women’s equality in church leadership and said he’d like to hear more about “mutuality” and not just “equality. I replied, “Me, too!” I love absolutely everything about mutuality. In fact, it’s one of my highest values and deepest needs. It means mutual dependence, reciprocity. To me, mutuality is the fullest expression of the kingdom of God. No one over or under another but alongside, mutually submitting to one another, …