i used to….but now i….

kathyescobar faith shifts, healing, incarnational, spiritual formation 24 Comments

i loved all those responses to yesterday’s soul care & spiritual practices during deconstruction!  so many healing practices; thank you for sharing and feel free to still add yours. the other day when i was driving in my car thinking about this series, an old post that i wrote 3 years ago came to mind.  it’s called “i-used-to-but-now-i”. i thought it actually might be a helpful exercise as part of our conversation on rebuilding after deconstructing because it’s centered on respecting where we were and where we …

soul care & spiritual practices for deconstruction

kathyescobar faith shifts, healing, spiritual formation 48 Comments

in the last post we made a few lists related to what helped & what didn’t from others during deconstruction. such good stuff, such hard stuff.  thank you for sharing so honestly.  i am going to try to pull something together from it so feel free to add yours if you haven’t already. as the last few post-series posts, i also wanted to take a little time to center on an oft-overlooked topic in the deconstruction conversation–how do we tend to our souls & our spiritual …

helpful & oh-so-not-helpful things people do and say along the way.

kathyescobar faith shifts, healing, incarnational 64 Comments

i have a a theory about people and pain.  when we see others in it, we don’t quite know what to do. the anxiety and discomfort of what other people are going through causes us to do and say a lot of really stupid things. almost every hurting person i know has a least a couple of stories of things people-said-and-did to them along the way that really was not helpful.  in fact, it often hurt–sometimes deeply.  simple fixes, trite spiritual phrases, and direct messages about …

last post for rebuilding after deconstructing: 8. trusting the path

kathyescobar faith shifts, healing, spiritual formation 52 Comments

well thank you, my friends, for taking this crazy journey for the past 2 weeks.  i am looking forward to getting back to the normal rhythm around here next week, 1 maybe 2 posts a week.  whoa, i can’t imagine blogging this much every week! but my hope for this series was always that we could get all of the posts out there in one big swoop and then over time, people would be able to access them as they needed over time.  i have been …

rebuilding after deconstructing: 7. exploring possibilities

kathyescobar faith shifts, healing, spiritual formation 6 Comments

this is the second-to-last installment of 7 major movements in rebuilding after deconstructing. tomorrow will be a wrap post, which is really the 8th–“trusting the path.” then early next week i want to brainstorm a few helpful lists together (it will be fun, i promise!). the other posts from the past 2 weeks are listed here.   * * * * * one of the hardest parts about writing a series this-packed-full-of-intensity is that everyone is in a different place.  some of us have already found …

rebuilding after deconstructing: 6. igniting passion

kathyescobar faith shifts, healing, spiritual formation 14 Comments

“the glory of God is man fully alive.” – st. irenaeus here we are, at part 6 of this crazy-intense series on rebuilding our faith after deconstructing.  the previous posts are introduction, 1. honoring the process 2. acknowledging losses 3. discovering what remains  4. finding what works  5. celebrating what was.   * * * * * the idea of this series is to provide a loose framework & practices for the big themes of rebuilding.  for some, it’s challenging & stirring up hard stuff. for others, it’s hopeful and …

rebuilding after deconstructing: 5. celebrating what was

kathyescobar faith shifts, healing, spiritual formation 20 Comments

oh i wish some of you could have seen me years ago.  i was the best-christian-good-girl-ever!  it would make you laugh (or cry).  and as much as i can’t believe that was me, i keep learning how important it is to honor that stage of my faith as a very important part of my story.  instead of rejecting it and being mad at myself for some of the things i believed & the ways i behaved, i am learning to honor and celebrate it. it was …

rebuilding after deconstructing: 4. finding what works

kathyescobar faith shifts, healing, spiritual formation 39 Comments

this is the 5th post in a series here on rebuilding after deconstructing and navigating through deep shifts in our faith.  the other posts are:  introduction, 1. honoring the process, 2. acknowledging losses. 3. discovering what remains.  thank you for all of the responses.  hard but beautiful stuff.  * * * * * every wednesday night at our house we have a “house of refuge”.  it’s a wild, diverse & open group that’s been meeting since the refuge started in 2006.  we share a meal & …