“um, well, it depends on what you mean by ‘Christian'”

kathyescobar crazy making, faith shifts, fundamentalism, healing, incarnational 10 Comments

In the earlier days of my faith, knowing who was and wasn’t a “Christian” was a big deal to me. There was something attached to it that was comforting, familiar, certain. When I look back on those years, “Is he/she a Christian?” would come up in countless ways–related to teachers, doctors, family members, auto mechanics, friends, you name it. Now, if I hear it, I often feel myself tense up and my skin get a little itchy. I feel weird about my reflexive response because I …

little (and big and every size in between) pockets of peace

kathyescobar dreams, incarnational, injustice, leadership 2 Comments

Oh, what a horrid month it’s been.  Beirut, Syria, Iraq, and Paris (and many, many others not highlighted in the news). So much violence, destruction, fear, and confusion. What can we do? How do we carry on with our real lives and not ignore the reality of such deep pain in our fellow humans? We can feel so helpless. I haven’t been writing much this month for all kinds of reasons (mainly, if it doesn’t come, I just don’t force it), but I felt an urge …

please dear God, help us find a better way to talk about abortion solutions

kathyescobar crazy making, healing, incarnational, injustice, relationships 6 Comments

I always get nervous when I post about this topic because it brings out the trolls. At the same time, I can barely stand how horrid the conversations about abortion seem to go online. I believe in every part of me that there’s a better way to talk about this and find some better solutions together.   The problem is that the conversation is so charged, polarized, and completely unsafe that no one can say anything about it without things going bonkers. We will never get to …

Christian show or tell?

kathyescobar church stuff, down we go, equality, faith shifts, healing, incarnational 16 Comments

I recently had a brief and good but challenging conversation with a friend about Christian belief. It wasn’t a long drawn out one, but as they were explaining the ins and outs of why a particular belief was important, I could feel my body tense up and my heart shut down. The only thing I could think of was “I don’t care. I don’t care. I don’t care. I don’t want to talk about this. I don’t want to talk about this. I don’t want to …

grace jealousy.

kathyescobar church stuff, crazy making, down we go, faith shifts, healing, identity 19 Comments

I started writing this post over three years ago but never got very far. However, this thought has come back to me a lot over the past several weeks I thought I’d finish this half-baked thought. Plus, today’s my birthday and I have been a bit nostalgic, thinking of the things I wish I had learned earlier, the things I’m so grateful I’m learning now, the things I am willing to stand on tables for, and the things that I just don’t have the energy for …

“privilege” doesn’t have to be a dirty word.

kathyescobar equality, healing, incarnational, injustice 7 Comments

“Privilege exists when one group has something of value that is denied to others simply because of the groups they belong to, rather than because of anything they’ve done or failed to do.” ~Peggy McIntosh The word “privilege” is being tossed around a lot these days, for good reason. There is a cry for justice, for equality, for systemic change in big ways right now and there’s no way around talking about privilege as part of the conversation. Some people say it doesn’t exist (don’t get me …

the simple, messy, complicated art of friendship.

kathyescobar advent & lent, church stuff, friendship, healing, incarnational, injustice, spiritual formation 5 Comments

Today is Maundy Thursday, the night of the Last Supper and Jesus reminding the disciples that they were no longer his servants but his friends (John 15:15). That receiving was just as important as giving. That they needed to “do as I have done for you” (John 13:15). A few weeks ago I had the privilege of going on a Learning and Listening Trip to Pine Ridge Indian Reservation in South Dakota. Some of you may already be familiar with it and the realities of the …

lifting heads, straightening backs.

kathyescobar equality, ex good christian women, healing, identity, women in ministry 13 Comments

Sometimes I get calls from women asking for help to get out of an abusive relationship. Skittish, scared, and filled with shame, they reach out and share their story. It’s so brave. Some are rich, some are poor. Some are educated, others have never graduated from high school. Some have kids while others don’t. Some have husbands, others never have. Some are leaders, others are followers. Some call Jesus their God, others lost their faith a long time ago. Their circumstances might be different but their …