in every human being jean vanier

the simple, messy, complicated art of friendship.

kathyescobar advent & lent, church stuff, friendship, healing, incarnational, injustice, spiritual formation 5 Comments

Today is Maundy Thursday, the night of the Last Supper and Jesus reminding the disciples that they were no longer his servants but his friends (John 15:15). That receiving was just as important as giving. That they needed to “do as I have done for you” (John 13:15). A few weeks ago I had the privilege of going on a Learning and Listening Trip to Pine Ridge Indian Reservation in South Dakota. Some of you may already be familiar with it and the realities of the …

when we seek connection

why i love inter-faith conversations.

kathyescobar dreams, faith shifts, friendship, healing, incarnational, spiritual formation, synchroblog 11 Comments

* This month’s Synchroblog is centered on what we appreciate about other religions. You can see the link list of other bloggers writing on this topic at the bottom of this post. I am grateful that almost 2 years ago a friend of mine from Denver invited me to the interfaith group she had been attending. I have been part of holding space for intra-faith dialogue (i love this little post that not that many people read) in different ways for a while (so hard!) but had …

we don’t fall asleep at the table.

kathyescobar a view from the margins, advent & lent, dreams, equality, friendship, incarnational, injustice, synchroblog 8 Comments

I haven’t had much time to write this past month. Ideas come floating by here and there, but in the hubub of the holiday, they magically disappear and I honestly can’t remember what any of them are anymore. I always take that as a sign that I somehow wasn’t supposed to write them. One has indeed lingered as part of the #staywokeadvent synchroblog series. All month long people are writing reflections centered on this season related to justice and racism and advent and Jesus. As I …

poverty & hidden rules & the best place to start

kathyescobar church stuff, crazy making, down we go, equality, friendship, incarnational, injustice 17 Comments

“but woe to you pharisees! for you tithe mint and rue and herbs of all kinds, and neglect justice and the love of God” – luke 11:42 last week a friend sent me the dave ramsey article–20 things the rich do every day. the list was a mixed bag and then i started to read the comments and had to click out of there as fast i could before i went a little crazy. rachel held evans wrote a great response  and i saw a few …

healing shame & division

kathyescobar church stuff, friendship, healing, incarnational, relationships 15 Comments

a few weeks ago at the bold boundaries sacred friendship gathering, hugo schwyzer, an amazing writer & speaker  & professor from LA, shared this little gem:  “the church’s witness is to heal shame and division.” that is what we are meant to do:  heal shame, heal division in this crazy mixed up world.  for the most part, i don’t think that is what “the church” is known for.  in fact, in so many ways we are known for just the opposite–for creating shame, for promoting division.  …

friendship: learning to let go

kathyescobar friendship, relationships, the refuge 9 Comments

* this is the 4th post of highlights from our sacred friendship summer camp, practical ideas for becoming better friends.   you can look back on the past few days to see the other posts; they are centered on the crazy stuff in our heads, safety & boundaries, and conflict.   * * * * one thing i’ve learned over the years is that every strength has a weakness.  and sometimes the stronger the strength, the stronger the weakness is on the other end.  one of my …

friendship: conflict is good (even though most of us hate it)

kathyescobar friendship, relationships, the refuge 12 Comments

* this is part 3 from the refuge’s sacred friendship summer camp. the questions in bold are ones we somehow talked about together at our gathering or in the homework.  * * * * * some of us are really good at navigating conflict in relationships, but many of us hate conflict.  look at a list of “adult children of alcoholics” and you will read my mail!   at the top of the list is avoiding conflict. for many of us, we haven’t had a lot …

friendship: safety & boundaries aren’t dumb psychology words

kathyescobar friendship, relationships, the refuge 16 Comments

* this is the next post from friendship summer camp.  it’s interesting that even as i share these here i can hear a voice that says “where’s the scripture in here? are we really going to talk about psychology stuff? come on, let’s talk about theology and church instead!” (hmm, mind-reading?).  but i will hold to what i keep learning–this stuff doesn’t drop out of the sky.  these skills help us become more loving human beings and i think that was always the idea! * * …