this past week i saw a flurry of facebook posts about john piper’s latest words about  masculine christianity.  i am pretty out of the blog-reading circuit because there are only so many hours in the day and mine are jam packed with people & kids & more kids & more people.  at the same time, i love that challenging conversations are happening and social media is a powerful tool to raise awareness.

i did not listen to john piper’s presentation or link to the blog post.   i don’t have the stomach or time for it, but i got the cliff notes version from rachel’s blog.  i like her idea of helping people consider other views of God that aren’t specifically masculine.  i have no trouble with God being masculine.  the trouble i have is assuming God is primarily masculine because Jesus was a guy and chose 12 male disciples and then building entire systems upon that thought, utterly dismissing a whole other half of God’s image and essence.  along with that half, i am certain we’re missing a whole lot of other things about God that we have been afraid to explore because the systems & churches we have been part of have kept God so contained.

john piper makes caricatured roles for men and women, over-simplifying the image of God placed in each of us.  this denies not only women of their fullness, but men as well.

whether we want to admit it or not, piper’s theology is deeply embedded into most of standard evangelical christianity.  it just is. men do certain things and women do other certain things.  if each sex would just step into “God’s intention for them” (“appropriate” social roles), everything will work just fine and everyone will be “free.”

when God created humans, God made us in in the fullness of God’s image.  not half, not part.  yes, we are unique and different, and that’s why we need each other to more accurately reflect the fullness of God’s image.  the body of Christ is a reflection of God. if that’s the case, then why is half missing, devalued, and thought of as less somehow?

change in “the church” is coming.  a holy stirring is happening and many people are starting to call it for what it is–oppression, sexism, and a fear-based theology that perpetuates injustice.   however, it has become so innate that merely trying to shake it out of our system isn’t going to cut it.  we’re not a few awesome blog posts away from changing these deeply grooved systems of injustice.

when we start thinking about change, there are two natural reactions to it that we think of first:

1.  prune off what’s not working.  if we can prune some of these injustices out of “the church”, we’ll be okay.  this is the idea of changing systems by making some adjustments here and there that will shift things.  raise awareness, start to think differently about it, help leaders become more sensitive to issues of equality, influence change from within.

2. raze the ground completely.  knock it all down.  it’s flawed, it doesn’t work, it harms people.  the whole thing is so jacked up that we just need to walk away from it entirely.

i feel strongly that alone, #1  just won’t work. i’m not saying that some systems can’t be changed from within but i think it’s a pretty brutal road and will require leaders who are willing to shrink their churches & ministries, pay some serious emotional, spiritual, and financial costs, and lose all kinds of things they are used to gaining.  honestly, that’s just not super likely on a wide scale.  human nature & self protection will strongly work against such courage.  pruning also dismisses the magnitude of the problem.  we’re talking about deeply grooved systems of injustice that go back to the beginning.  the root system is strong;  a little tweaking isn’t going to bring full equality for anyone. 

i also believe that blowing the whole thing up isn’t really an option.  it works for some people.  they believe in certain scriptural interpretations & hold dearly to their tenents. i may disagree, but i don’t think that means there aren’t valuable things that happen for people through their churches and so scrapping the whole thing isn’t really fair or respectful.

i think there’s a much better option:

plant new trees. 

trees that have the roots of equality from the very beginning.

trees that gain nourishment from a free-er gospel and soil that is enriched with freedom and hope instead of fear and absolute certainty.

trees that have men and women and rich and poor and educated and undeducated and black and white and gay and straight all tangled up together from the beginning.

trees that are tended to gently and naturally instead of pumped with unnatural growth agents & pesticides that try to advance the progression of development to “catch up faster” to other churches that will always have the advantage of time and power on their side.

trees that get their strength from the beatitudes not their latest and greatest how-to-grow books and conferences.

trees that are well-watered by people who are tired of talk and are ready for action.

trees that over time will flourish and bring shade and fruit and all kinds of other goodness for generations to come in the communities & cultures where they are planted.

a diverse ecosystem of trees that more accurately reflect the fullness of God’s image. 

these trees can be all kinds of shapes and sizes–individual relationships, groups, churches, ministries, organizations–little pockets of love & freedom cropping up all over that influence people and model a better way, a free-er way, an equal way, a more “oh, that’s what Jesus looks like” way.

yeah, pruning won’t cut it.  razing isn’t an option.  let’s get planting. i have a feeling some of you are really good gardeners.

* * * * *

here are a few other links i wanted to highlight:

many of you have probably read it, but if you haven’t check out rachel held evans’ post this week: they were right (and wrong) about the slippery slope.  i slipped off the slope a long time ago and sometimes tell those that wonder, “yeah, i completely slipped off the slope and somehow found the most solid ground i’ve ever stood on.” 

our walking wounded online class starts monday february 6th.  registrations are possible until then, so if you or someone you know want to be part,  you can sign up at that link.  it’s going to be good! i also am not sure when we’re planning on running it again so now’s the right time if you’re on the fence.

i wrote a little post for provoketive magazine last month that i forgot to share called stories that matter.

lastly, i posted this on facebook & it made some pretty good rounds, but if you missed it, here’s the trailer from my awesome friend pam hogeweide’s new book, just released at the end of january–unladylike: resisting the injustice of inequality in the church:

• one word – i decided to participate in this for 2012.  in the past i’ve had five and end up never remembering any of them!  here’s a post i wrote for the refuge blog that has some ideas if you haven’t already thought of one yet.  my 2012 word is:  focus.  oh yeah, that’s the right word.

• honoring doubt – my monthly contribution to sheloves magazine is on one of my favorite topics from down we go: honoring doubt. i hope we can keep creating safe spaces to honor doubt.

• when Jesus met mary: a sacred friendship gathering – i am very excited to be part of this gathering–when Jesus met mary: a conference exploring friendship between men & women–in april in chicago centered on sacred cross-gender friendships hosted by my friend dan brennan. all of the details are on the website.  let me know if you can come be part of this brave & much-needed conversation.

• unladylike – my friend pam hogeweide’s book unladylike: resisting the injustice of inequality in the church is being released at the end of the is month by civitas press.  you can preorder a copy now if you want.  it rocks!

• and the resignation of eve – my other northwest friend jim henderson is always stirring up some great stuff for us to consider.  his new book the resignation of eve: what if adam’s rib is no longer willing to be the church’s backbone is coming out soon, too. i’m very glad this critical topic is getting some traction.

• convergence – i couldn’t go last year because of a family trip but am planning on being there this year, march 2-4 in portland. this year’s theme is:  staying power–presence & possibility as leaders.  if you haven’t been before, it’s a really wonderful gathering of strong & passionate women.

• synchroblog – we are starting off 2012 with a new teammate  & a survey to help gather ideas for the upcoming year.  if you are a blogger and want to be challenged to write on a variety of topics at the same time as other bloggers, all are welcome.

• with communities - my awesome friend john martinez created a log-in-so-there’s-greater-safety-and-connection site for incarnational community cultivators who could use some support, input, encouragement, and connection with other people who believe that prepositions matter and are trying crazy stuff, too. check it out here.

• walking wounded: hope for those hurt by the church – my friend phyllis mathis & i are hosting a 4 week online group for those of you out there who are painfully disillusioned by a faith or church experience.  our october 2011 gathering in denver was great for those who could pull it off, but this is a chance for others to participate, too.  because of some schedule conflicts, the date got moved to february 6th 2012.  go to live it to the full to register & for all the details.  if you or someone you know could use some healing, hope, laughter, and intention on getting unstuck, we’d love to have you join us.  this little video is sort of serious (i promise we’ll laugh and have fun, too) but gives an idea of what we are doing.  thanks for passing it on to friends who want to save some money on therapy and get some traction on healing in this new year.
  

i hope your year is getting off to a good start. i am looking forward to what’s ahead! peace, kathy

* * * * *

“wake up, wake up, o zion!

clothe yourself with strength.

put on your beautiful clothes, o holy city of jerusalem..

rise from the dust…

sit in a place of honor.

remove the chains of slavery from your neck, o captive daughter of zion.”

isaiah 52:1-2

this scripture came to mind two weekends ago during our walking wounded gathering as i listened to two amazing women briefly sharing their painful church story of being silenced and unvalued in the church because they are female.  honestly, in those moments, my heart physically hurts.  i see their beauty, their power, their wisdom and wonder how in the $*!^$&^#%$ the church, the place that’s supposed to be Christ’s bride and a reflection of his image, could silence half its members so overtly (and somehow get away with it!).

the reality is that many other voices have been silenced by the church, far beyond only women.  and because of this lack of voices, we have all suffered.  we have missed the voices of the poor, the oppressed, the brown, the gay, the divorced, the orphaned, the young, the uneducated, the theologically incorrect, the tromped on, the forgotten.  we have given our microphones and our pulpits and our programs over to the strong and the powerful and created a system where those on the margins are ignored and dismissed.

but something’s breaking out right now that can’t be squelched.  we see it in the town squares that are filled with average people who are protesting wall street & starting to say “we’re tired of the powerful and greedy controlling our world, something’s got to change.”  we see it in the mass exodus young people are making out of the church because it refuses to focus on issues they care about related to justice & mercy & equality.  we see it in the long line of former-church-people who have deconstructed their faith & are finding something more real because they could no longer tolerate the deep inconsistencies between faith & practice. we see it in the groundswell of advocacy & support for equality and dignity for all regardless of sexual orientation.

in all kinds of places we are seeing it–a movement from below.  a groundswell from the bottom.  an uprising where little pockets of people are saying “we’re not going to do this anymore…..we’re tired of people’s dignity being stripped…it’s time for change.” 

on the whole, the tops of systems aren’t changing.  the hierarchy remains.  the powerful and strong keep making rules & laws & policies & money.  many are hunkering down, hoping they can weather this storm and eventually the unruly sheep will get back in line and start towing the line once again.

but it’s not going to happen.  the sheep are getting tired of being jacked around by oppressive shepherds who don’t care about their well-being.  who put their own self-interest above the common good.  who allow others to be mistreated.  who put chains around others necks instead of setting people free.

the sheep are rising up.

yeah, we’re rising up.   not to rise up and away from problems and pain, but rather to have courage and strength to enter into it.  all over the place, God is calling people to freedom, to living out the gospel instead of talking about it, to practice instead of theory.   i call it a “holy stirring” and i think we will see it get stronger & wider & deeper over the upcoming years.

so many people i know are refusing to be part of oppressive systems anymore.  they are finding their way outside of the traditional confines of religion & meeting God in unlikely places.  they are renewing their passions and serving in all kinds of wild and beautiful ways that is viewed by the establishment as subversive even though it’s the closest thing to the gospel i’ve ever seen.  artists are creating.  silenced voices are speaking.  young people are voting with their feet.  chains are breaking.  dignity is being slowly & painfully being restored in little pockets of love & freedom that are often unseen & unnoticed by the masses.

but it’s happening.

the prophets are emerging from below, from underneath, from unlikely places.

God is calling people out of numbness and complacency.  and just like our hands feel when we warm them up after they freeze in the snow, it’s going to hurt.  like really hurt.  unfreezing our hearts, hands, feet, mouths, and brains is going to hurt as we thaw out and find our true identity created in the image of God.  parts of us are going to come alive that were once left for dead.  we’re going to have to use muscles that have atrophied.  we’re going to feel things we haven’t felt before.  we’re going to be more vulnerable and unprotected.  we’re going to doubt our voices.  we’re going to hear the critics tell us that we’re stupid & disgruntled & should quit complaining.  we’re going to doubt ourselves and wonder if maybe “going back to egypt” will make it feel better.

some will go back to their “proper place” and feel safe again.

but far more others are going to keep waking up, rising up, and breaking free from the chains that once kept us captive.  we are going to keep being set free and help others be set free, too.   we are going to care about the things that Jesus cares about like justice & mercy & compassion & peace & hope & restoration.  we are going to band together with others from below & form little armies of change that will shift laws & topple kingdoms & break down all kinds of walls that keep people stuck. 

there’s a rising up from below, calling us out of numbness.  calling us to freedom. calling us to justice.  calling us to mercy.  calling us to love.

God, keep thawing us out. we know it’s time. 

* * * * *

ps:  i have a post up today at shelovesmagazine as part of a monthly column called sheloves God. this one is called leaving the ninety-nine for the one & is adapted from the chapter in down we go called extending love, mercy and compassion. sheloves is a prophetic voice calling us out of numbness in all kinds of ways.

* * * * *

check out other bloggers writing about the prophets this month (i’ll add more links as they come in tonight):

• Joy Wilson at Solacetree- The Blessing of Losing Your Faith
• Jeremy Myers at Till He Comes – I Have a Dream
• Glenn Hager at Breathe – Uncomfortably Numb
• Linda at Kingdom Grace – On Earth as it is in Heaven
• Sally at Eternal Echoes – Where are the True Prophets?
• Tammy Carter at Blessing the Beloved – No Compromise
• Alan Knox at The Assembling of Church – My Word of Prophecy:  Quit Listening to Prophetic Voices
• Liz at Gracerules – Listen
• Christine Sine at Godspace – Surrounded by Prophetic Voices: Clouds of Witnesses That Call Us Out of Numbness
• Amy Martin – The Window of Suffering, the Beginning of Hope 
• Kathy Escobar at The Carnival in My Head- Rising Up From Below 
• K.W. Leslie at More Christ – What is God Challenging You to Do?
• Katherine Gunn at A Voice in the Desert – Where is Your Heart? 
• Steve Hayes at Khanya – Murder of the Cathedral
• Leah Chang at desertsspiritsfire – Wall Street, Our Street
• Bobby Aunder at Deconstructing Neverland – Shift 
• Minnow at Minnowspeaks – Day of Dialogue

i will never know what it’s like to be gay.  i can only listen and learn from my friends & family who are.

i will likely never know what it’s like to be poor and live in section 8 housing.  i can only listen and learn from my friends & family who are.

but i do know what it’s like to be a woman leader in a man’s world.  i know what it feels like to be excluded. i know what it feels like see doors open & checks written & support given to men-with-the-connections while i struggle and scrape.  i know what it’s like to be on the underside of power and how helpless and dignity-stripping it can feel.

and those who are men can never know what it’s like.  they can only listen and learn from their friends & family who are women.

white privilege, male privilege, straight privilege, economic privilege are real.

i’ve heard it dismissed sometimes, heard white people talk about “the minorities get all the jobs and get to go to the top of the line now”.  heard men talk about “i don’t know what women are talking about, we ask them to be part but they always say no.“  heard straight people talk about “gay people have more rights now than i do” and economically stable people talk about “if those poor people would just work harder & smarter they wouldn’t have so many problems.”

it’s so easy to talk when we don’t know what it feels like to be another person, to walk in another person’s shoes.

we should never deny the reality and power of white privilege, male privilege, straight privilege, and economic privilege.  the power each of these carry is real and must be acknowledged.

when we hold the privilege we must do our part to listen to those who don’t.

this is no easy task, but we will need brave men & women who are willing to lead these conversations–to provide listening posts to hear from those on the underside of the privilege.  to learn what it feels like.  to learn what might help shift things.  to learn a better way.

we do not need to do feel guilty for being white, male, or straight or having money in the bank; that’s definitely not the idea here but is the easiest place for us to default.  we each are who we are, were born how we were born.  but i do believe strongly that we need to understand the power that comes from it instead of pretend it doesn’t exist or shoo it away as someone else’s problem.  re-thinking power is important.

in the kingdom of God there should be no white privilege, male privilege, straight privilege, economic privilege.  Christ breaks down all of those barriers. but the kingdom of God won’t just drop out of the sky.  we will have to work hard, sacrifice our time, ego, hearts, and pride to create it.  we will have to let go of assumptions that “it’s not that big of a deal” when we’re the ones with the privilege.

at the same time, when we are the ones who don’t have the privilege we will have to be brave enough to sit at the table with those who do & listen to their hearts & stories, too.  we will have to create containers for understanding & love & hope & possibility of a better way--together.

God, show us how to listen well to each other–those with privilege to those without, those without privilege to those with it.  help us boldly act to break down the barriers that divide, oppress, and strip dignity. help us each play our part in practicing equality–not just in theory but in tangible, active ways that restore, reconcile & renew us individually & corporately.

this post has been rattling around in my head for a little while & i finally got it out.  i’d love to hear some of your thoughts….

the clinic serves all kinds of clients, but primarily women who are domestic violence victims.  almost every woman who is trying to rebuild a new life has some form of violence in her past–sexual, physical, or emotional.  this team stands on their behalf for free or barely anything, representing them in court, guiding them through the legal process, and helping them get custody of their kids, obtain their papers, and begin to move toward self-sufficiency and stability.  without good legal help, the possibilities for many of these women is slim to none.

here’s a little excerpt from JAMLAC’s latest letter-to-their-supporters:

“close your eyes and hold out your hands.”

tina diaz, immigration director at the justice and mercy legal aid clinic (JAMLAC), places the card the size of a driver’s license in rosa’s* hands and tells her to open her eyes.  as she does, she sees a piece of identification with her name and photograph on it.

rosa begins to weep–with joy.  we rejoice with her. tina does her “happy dance.”  rosa hugs all of us, thanks God, and exclaims “he will never touch me again!”

several months earlier, rosa lay on the kitchen floor in her home, unconscious and bleeding from the head, because her husband had hit her over the head with a blunt object.  the next morning, a neighbor noted her injury and insisted she go to the hospital, where she was stitched up.

rosa marshaled the courage to finally press harges and to follow through in cooperating with authorities.  because she lacked money and connections, she sought help here at JAMLAC.  we helped her obtain custody of her children and, eventually, permission to work in the unite states.  a government issued identification with her name and photograph–a simple plastic card–became the path to empowerment and self-sufficiency.

like many of our clients, rosa first walked through the door of JAMLAC beaten, broken and impoverished.  she had no control over her own life, and no idea how to change her situation.

here are some of the typical threats our clients report their abusers make:

“if you call the police, i’ll make sure you never see the kids again.”

“if you go to the hospital, i won’t file the necessary paperwork with the immigration authorities for you.”

“if you call the police, you will be arrested and deported.”

unfortunately, low-income women caught in this cycle of abuse and control generally do not have the knowledge or resources to break free.  at JAMLAC we provide help and hope to women like rosa, who are in abusive situations and poverty.

today, rosa is a beautiful and confident woman.  she is employed and creating a productive life for herself and her children.  we thank God for the opportunity we have to advocate for women and children as they move from being victims to being survivors–from being beaten to thriving.

*the client’s real name has been changed to protect her identity

as i re-read this letter, it gives me chills. i have had the privilege of meeting some of JAMLAC clients over the past few years and their stories of transformation are amazing.   in the work of the refuge i have seen what can happen when women get the care and support they need to break free from the cycle of abuse. it is glorious.

amazing things can happen when the poor & oppressed have a loving advocate.

JAMLAC is always understaffed, underfunded, and overworked.  the needs far outweigh the resources, and they do brilliant work on a shoestring.  they have developed beautiful partnerships with community agencies here in denver to work together on behalf of women.  if any of you are interested in supporting their work, they can always use the love.

at the same time, in every single city around the world there are advocates who are working on behalf of women.  they are running shelters, transitional housing programs, legal aid clinics, and empowerment programs for women.  faith-based or not, they are advocating for  God’s children & always need love & support.  there are so many ways we can encourage this kind of work on behalf of women–with resources, time, and heart.  i would love to see more and more of these agencies & ministries around the world be flooded with help!

i just wanted to share that today.  thank you JAMLAC for being beautiful advocates for women & children. you remind me of what’s important–restoring dignity where it’s been lost.

i really appreciated his enthusiasm & desire to press the envelope a little (and the date worked for jose & i to go together & have a fun night away afterward) so i said yes.

yesterday i got an email from him letting me know that unfortunately when the other pastors and leaders found out that a female pastor was speaking, they banded together to reject the idea.  they said they couldn’t listen to someone they didn’t agree with and strong-armed a very conservative evangelical into the spot instead.

his email was so kind, and he was so sad that his hope got hijacked.  he tried to fight the good fight and just couldn’t make it happen.  i ended up talking to him on the phone just to make sure i was clear what he was really saying and didn’t misunderstand.  i asked, “so, is it really just the woman pastor thing or is it about my beliefs or ?“  he said that the woman thing was definitely the main issue, the deal breaker, and anything that remotely is connected to the word “emerging” was just icing on the cake.

we had a nice conversation & i really felt bad for him, really.  it’s a drag when you can see a different way & have hope for what could be and tradition & power sucks everyone back under.

for me, it’s now just one less thing to do in a busy month.  but, it hurts.  it just does.  it’s hard to not have it hurt.  one of the reason is it’s not one isolated incident.  it comes upon a long string of these over the years that get really tiring and discouraging.

the system is broken, my friends.  it truly is.  it’s so easy for people to think that we’ve come a long way but everyone needs to know how far we still have to go.

the insidious-ness of gender inequality is ugly.  and deep.  in the big scheme, it has nothing to do with baccalaureate speakers.  it has everything to do with power & oppression & stripping women of their dignity & silencing voices that were created by God to speak, to create, to dream, to inspire, to partner, to nurture, to build, to love freely.

so, that’s why i’m a little sad this week.  a little beat-up, a little burned out.  a little sick to my stomach.

and very grateful that i never, ever feel this in my community or in my marriage or with those on the fringes.   i am so thankful. they help me hold on to hope.  men & women alongside each other as equals is a beautiful thing.

* * * * *

a few days ago i walked a labyrinth with a friend.  no matter how long or short, whenever i carve out quiet time & get some silence & space to connect with God, i am always refreshed somehow.  nothing super exciting happened in the moment but i did have this strong and beautiful sense of God’s sureness underneath my feet as i walked.

it was the world’s ugliest labryinth (really) and it was a little windy & cold outside but as i walked i started noticing these little rocks that were sparkly & shiny here and there.  they were scattered within the stark brownness of the rest of the path.  i felt this sense of God whispering, “notice the beauty…don’t miss the beauty…see, it’s here…sometimes it’s hard to notice but it’s there.” in the middle of the mess of living in the trenches with people, sometimes i just get tired.  the needs always are bigger than our resources.  pain doesn’t magically disappear.  poverty is complicated.  abuse has long-lasting and brutal effects.  and a Jesus-centered life of descent as opposed to the life of ascent (even though that one’s taught in Jesus’ name, too) is definitely a bumpier road.

but that’s the road that Jesus is calling us to in the beatitudes.  it is a beautiful road.  and an ugly road (my friend deb made up a new word–beautifugly).  and most definitely the road i want to continue to walk because there’s so much to be learned here.

in this fourth beatitude, Jesus says, “blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled” (NIV).  in the NLT it says, “blessed are those who hunger and thirst for justice, for they will be satisfied.” the word in the king james for righteousness in the broader sense is centered on the way toward a state approved of by God, integrity, purity, virtue of life.  in the narrower sense, it is justice.

there are three parts of this beatitude to consider.

the first is the “hunger and thirst” part.  this implies that we aren’t where we want to be.  we aren’t satisfied with the status quo.  we want more.  people who are hungry and thirsty will go to pretty big lengths to try and find food & water.  embedded in these words are longing, desire, and some kind of movement.

in this past week i have had several conversations centered around women & the church.  biblical equality is such a foreign concept in so many evangelical circles & every time i think about the inequality & the perpetuating of oppression toward women that is basically the norm i get all riled up.  and it reminds me just how powerful the status-quo-and-what-we’ve-always-been-fed is.  if it doesn’t affect us, often we don’t really care.  if everyone else is doing it or buys into it or throws “God says” into the sentence, shouldn’t we, too?  hungering and thirsting after integrity looks to me like a holy-stirring inside that says “things are not right and i want to play a part in making them right.”

the second part of the beatitude–righteousness–might easily mispoint us toward personal piousness & making sure we somehow have our own ducks in a row. but what if we read it more corporately and considered communally what hungering and thirsting for integrity & justice really looked like in action?  so much of what i had been taught in a lot of my contemporary christian experience was focused on “personal righteousness”–basically making sure that i was “right with God” somehow.  it centered on thinking the right thoughts & believing the right things.  when i read this now, i see something far deeper. i see a corporate thirst for integrity & wholeness that comes not from ascending up toward God, getting one step away from our humanity and one step closer to godliness, but rather a descent toward embracing our humanness & need for God & the wholeness that comes from that.

the last part of the beatitude says that the blessing of hungering and thirsting for righteousness is that we will be fed, filled, satisfied. i don’t think this is a contentment that brings stagnation or inaction.  but i think it is a contentment that is God-fuel, holy spirit reminders like the one i got yesterday at the labyrinth–“i’m here, strong and firm, i’m underneath you, and i’m making beauty in the ugliness.” as i was walking the labyrinth the lovely words of julian of norwich, the 14th century mystic, came to me.  i knew it must somehow be God because it is very rarely something that i reference or think of.  she says, “all shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well.” somehow that’s what satisfied, full, filled somehow means to me.

in the midst of Jesus’ seemingly-crazy-upside-down-living we can have deep peace. in the midst of longing for change in our own lives, in the lives of the world & the neighborhoods & churches & families, we can have deep peace.  in the midst of embracing our humanity & letting God work in our lives, we can have deep peace.  in the midst of actively pursuing justice & advocating for change, we can have deep peace.

God, help us be people who long for change, in our own lives & in the communities we live in.  and then, guide us as we act on those longings and pursue justice, integrity, wholeness and healing.  may we experience your deep peace in the midst.

* * * * *

ps:  i posted this on facebook but i thought i’d share it here, too, as i know some of you aren’t on there.  it’s really great stuff from my friend craig spinks & recycle your faith called unprogrammed relationships. watch this one & also the one called a loving contempt.

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one thing I can never get my head around is how we as “christians” can spend so much energy around certain hot-button topics and ignore so many other important ones.  it makes me so sad that somehow we are known in this world for being anti-gay, republican, and extremely judgmental.  i remember years ago seeing the study that was done somewhere in california where people were asked “what do you think of when you hear the word ‘christian’?” the responses were:  “judgmental, mean, anti-homosexual, republican.” when asked the question, “what do you think of when you hear the word ‘Jesus’”, they responded with “loving, kind, compassionate, merciful.” christians on the whole aren’t known for our love.  it’s a little like what Gandhi says—“I like your Christ, but your Christians are not like your Christ.” that makes me sad.

so when it comes to this issue of legalizing same-sex marriage, it follows that somehow we’d be known as being some of the biggest, angry proponents against it.

i am not gay.  i don’t know what it feels like to be gay.

but I have a lot of friends who are.  and I do think that they have the right to legally marry if they want to be.

i completely respect that there are people who view the Bible as crystal clear against homosexuality and I understand how this law is one that they wouldn’t necessarily agree with.  at the same time, I can’t for the life of me think why they’d spend so much time and energy jumping up and down about it when it really doesn’t affect them, really.  people can keep on doing their thing as heterosexuals & mind their own business.  but that’s not how it often works.  instead of respectfully seeing the issue differently, somehow some have to use a bullhorn and make their position known and “fight for what they’re sure is right.” I think it’s kind of ridiculous, really, especially when Jesus came to cut across the crazy religious and political systems that everyone was ascribing to.  when i read the gospels, i don’t see Jesus clamoring for “family values.”  i see him advocating for mercy, grace, and healing for the outcasts & marginalized & chastising everyone who thinks that “right religion ” is the answer.

i honestly think some of the religious clamoring when it comes to politics & religion comes from just plain ol’ being scared (years ago, i was there, and i think that was my predominant feeling–fear).

• we live in fear instead of trust in a big, big God.
• we try to control instead of let go.
• we think we have to be the policeman and gatekeepers of our interpretation of “God’s truth.”
• we have to create an “us and them” to keep the riff-raff out.
• we have to “win” or else somehow “God loses.”
• we refuse to let ourselves feel what it might really, really be like to walk in someone else’s shoes.
• we want to separate ourselves from what we don’t agree with instead of engage in kind, loving, respectful relationship together despite our differences.

while we don’t have to agree wholeheartedly with all of the principles & doctrines of every church or every law that gets made, i think we need to respect that laws that are made to protect individual’s rights.  history tells us that equal rights for women & for people of color have faced (and continue to) uphill battles.  and we can’t forget how the Bible has been used to support oppression of both of those groups, too.  the issue of legalizing same-sex marriage is about giving people equal rights & value as human beings.

i also do not think every church or individual needs to support gay marriage; if it violates the tenants of anyone’s interpretation of faith, then of course anyone should have the freedom to kindly not participate.   but the key word is “kindly.” this is what gets us into all kinds of trouble.  i have a dear lesbian friend who communicates her heart well.  she is so clear about respecting that “not everyone has to agree with who i am but please, oh please, just at least be kind and loving and honor that you don’t understand what it’s like to be me.” I do not think that’s too much to ask.  if i were gay, that is what I would hope from my brothers & sisters.  not hate.  not judgement.  not ugliness and division.  just some understanding.  and maybe some application of “the golden rule.”

personally, i want to be known as a dignity restorer, not a dignity stripper.  i want to be willing to walk in another person’s shoes and have some understanding of what it must be like.  and i hope that some day “the church”  is known for its heart to love & advocate for the marginalized across all kinds of dividing lines instead of feeling the desperate need to be God’s policemen.

i’d love to hear some of your thoughts, too.

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other bloggers participating this month:

Kathy Baldock at Canyonwalker Connections – Marriage “I Do” For Who

Dan Brennan at Faith Dance – Sexual Difference, Marriage and Friendship

Steve Hayes at Khanya – Same Sex Marriage Synchroblog

Sonja Andrews at Calacirian – In Defense Of Marriage

John C O’Keefe – Exactly What Is Gay Marriage

Liz Dyer at Grace Rules – Nobody knows why or how same-sex marriage is harmful

Herman Groenewald at Along The Way – Same Sex Debate

Margaret Boelman at Minnowspeaks – What Have We Done

David Henson at unorthodoxology – ban marriage

Erin Word at Mapless – Synchroblog: Legalizing Same Sex Marriage

Joshua Jinno at Antechurch – The Church Is Impotent

k.w. leslie – mountains, molehills & same sex marriage

Peter Walker at Emerging Christian – Synchroblog – Same Sex Marriage

Tia Lynn Lecorchick  – Conservative Christians and Same Sex Marriage

* i wrote this post months & months ago, before everything broke out in arizona.  i never finished it & decided to now as part of this month’s synchroblog.  check out the other links at the bottom of this post.  lots of interesting stuff!

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one of the most controversial and popular posts i have ever written was about health care reform called it’s easy to be against health care reform when you have insurance.  i always joke that i wish people would get as riled up about justice & equality & mercy for the poor and marginalized as much as they get riled up about the thought of government-run health care. it is always interesting to me what presses people’s hot buttons; well, it’s more weird than interesting, and i wonder what might be different in the world if christians took all the time they spent arguing about Bible interpretation and channeled it into advocating for the least of these instead.

i am very passionate about immigration reform for a variety of reasons.  first and foremost, i believe that as a Christ-follower, it is my responsibility to advocate for those without voice & power regardless of race, gender, socioeconomics & a wide variety of other reasons why people are oppressed & marginalized.  also, my husband is hispanic; his parents immigrated to the US from el salvador when he was four years old.  they had papers & are some of the most dedicated, loyal, faithful american citizens this country could ever ask for.  at the same time, they have helped many people over the years get their papers, find their way, and learn how to make a life here.  lastly, while i respect that the laws of this land are very complicated, just because it’s the law doesn’t mean i have to agree with it or that it’s right.

i am not going to get into all the ins and outs of immigration reform in this blog; the best sources for that are sojourners, who always do a great job of really breaking down the issues & helping us understand what’s at stake and how we can influence government decision making.

the part that i’d like to focus on is what’s going on inside each of us about it.  why are we scared of illegal immigrants?  what if we were treated like them?  are we willing to look seriously at the power dynamics that lie underneath and respect that it goes far beyond just a current events issue?

here are some of my half-baked thoughts about why i think it’s easy to be against immigration reform when we have papers.

• we must come face to face with how much we feel threatened by people who aren’t like us.   i think this is a big issue in this conversation because we tend to be so segregated in all kinds of ways–across socioeconomics, race, religious preferences, etc. i can’t tell you how many people who make derogatory comments about spanish speakers speaking spanish in public.  why does that freak us out so much?   it’s just their language, and um, even though we act like it, english-speakers aren’t the center of the universe.  i think we need to examine our prejudices.  i noticed one time when i was driving down the street how i locked my doors when i came to a street corner with some african american kids standing on it.  it felt horrible, my reflex reaction, and i have reflected on that moment many a time.  i think we must continually examine the truth in our hearts about how we feel about people who are different from us.  why do they scare us?  what makes us feel weird around them?   what does it say about us?  what is God stirring up in us about it?

• we need to respect that each and every one of these “illegal immigrants” have a story. real, ugly, beautiful stories of a life on this earth with no power and margin.  they are mothers & fathers & daughters & sons just like us, with the same hopes & dreams & desires & fears.  they tell tales of abuse and hunger and thirst and life and love.  not one of the people i know who have immigrated here ever wished that they had to, in a similar vein that i don’t know one single woman who has had an abortion that wanted to.  oh, it’s so easy to say “well, they could have just stayed and figured it out” but my response to that is “try it for a while and see how desperate you might get to build a better life for your kids.” true compassion comes from putting ourselves in another man’s shoes.  it’s so easy to point when we’ve never been there.

• throwing in the “you always have to follow the law no matter what” argument is very inconsistent with many biblical stories. yes, no doubt, i am all for following the laws & rules of a culture and God’s word talks about submitting to the authorities.  at the same time, we are also called to “follow God, not man”; look at the story of abraham, an illegal immigrant who lied to protect his family & left all that he knew behind.  he is the father of israel yet in this current culture he would be in the ICE facility waiting to get deported.   i just think we can’t get away from the reality that regardless of how they got here, they are here & we have to look at the much bigger story about our humanity, our hearts, power & the dynamics of inclusion & exclusion over the government’s laws. some good material on this has been written by r. danny carroll who is an old testament professor at denver seminary called christians at the border: immigration, the church, and the Bible. i haven’t read it but i had the chance to glance through it and it looked really solid.

• is it possible we’re jealous of how hard others work? i am just wondering, that’s all.  it’s a little like the workplace where everyone gets mad at the hard worker for working faster than they are because it means that others might have to up our game?

• physical borders represent emotional borders. i think tighter restrictions on border control and the idea of a mile high electric fence that “keeps the riffraff out” is a metaphor for something far deeper that is going on within us in our lives, our communities, and our churches.  we protect and insulate ourselves instead of learning and embracing others.  our lines get drawn and we hide behind them because it’s “the law” instead of engaging in the hard work of humbling ourselves and respecting we might have something to learn from people who aren’t like us.  this happens with world religions, racial differences, socioeconomic differences, and a whole host of other dividers.

• these friends are living in fear and without basic human rights. my husband is a pro-bono lawyer & works with domestic violence victims in denver, mainly spanish speakers.  through him i hear story after story of women who are being stripped of basic human dignity and in horribly abusive situations but are terrified of going to the authorities out of fear for deportation.  the immigration authorities aren’t under the same jurisdiction & protections that local law enforcement are and have un-checked power & control that can be really scary.

• since when were the ways of the kingdom of God about protecting ourselves? the ways of Jesus are radically un-self-protecting & require risk & trust & sacrifice.  i do not expect all the laws of the land to bend toward Jesus-y ways, but i am always so shocked by a lot of christian’s individual and corporate response to this issue.  i think what is at the heart of it is a lack of trust.  a feeling that if “we don’t protect ourselves, we’re toast.”  by digging in our heels toward self-protection instead of offering it up to those who need it more, we dismiss the power of the Holy Spirit and buy into the lie that this world is about us feeling safe, in control, and comfortable.

oh, please don’t think for a minute i presume to know very much about the ins and outs of immigration legislation.   i don’t.  but i believe that the reason why this touches such a chord in our hearts is because it taps into core-humanity-issues of prejudice & power & fear. and i think we’d much rather hide behind “because it’s the law” than look at that.  i have deep respect for so many people i have encountered out here in blog-land and in denver who are passionately advocating and working tangibly on behalf of illegal immigrants & judicial reform.  it has renewed my hope, seeing so many beautiful friends who are using their papers, power, and privilege, they will use those things on behalf of those who don’t. i sorta think that’s what Jesus would do.

ps: below is the song that came to mind as i was writing this post (the bad words are bleeped out).  yeah, until we’ve walked a mile in another’s shoes, we don’t know what it’s like to have to choose.

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here are some other bloggers writing on this topic this week.  check them out:

Mike Victorino at Still A Night Owl – Being the Flag
Liz Dyer at Grace Rules – Together We Can Make Dreams Come True
Sonnie Swentson-Forbes at Hey Sonnie – Immigration Stories
Matt Stone at Glocal Christianity – Is Xenophobia Ever Christlike?
Steve Hayes at Khanya – Christians and the Immigration Issue
Ellen Haroutunian - Give Me Your Tired …
Bethany Stedman – Choosing Love Instead of Fear
Pete Houston at Peter’s Progress – Of Rape and Refuge
Joshua Seek – Loving Our Immigrant Brother
Amanda MacInnis at Cheese Wearing Theology – Christians and Immigration
Sonja Andrews at Calacirian – You’re Right
Jonathan Brink – Immigration Synchroblog
Peter Walker at Emerging Christian – Synchroblog Immigration Reform
Steven Calascione at Eirenikos – The Jealousy of Migration
George Elerick at The Love Revolution – We’re Not Kings or Gods
Beth Patterson at Virtual Tea House – What we resist not only persists but will eventually become our landlord
K. W. Leslie at The Evening of Kent - On American Immigration

Jeff Goins – When Immigration Gets Personal

i did want to share this piece that i shared at this past saturday evening’s refuge gathering.  every so often we have benefit concerts called thevenue@thegrange that raise awareness & money for ministries/organizations who are dedicated to loving the marginalized & oppressed.   this past saturday we focused on human trafficking & our dear friends at oasis USA.  we also are collecting aluminum for cans for hope, a simple, beautiful home-grown ministry dedicated to recycling cans & giving 100% of the proceeds  to support women who have been rescued from trafficking.  it was a fun simple evening with music & spoken word & food & video. nothing snazzy, just love, refuge-style.

i wrote this piece for this gathering; like all spoken words, it’s kind of hard to recreate the moment.  but i would like to share it as a reminder of the ravages of human trafficking & how important it is that we use our voices, our hands, our hearts, our feet on behalf of those who have been stripped of theirs. and to remember that our freedom and others freedom are all tied up together.  they are somebody’s daughter, somebody’s son.  they are our daughters, our sons. one warning, it’s kind of intense.  i swear that in real life, i am really light-hearted, ha ha.  but i do take the issue of oppression and abuse extremely seriously.

somebody’s daughter, somebody’s son

they are somebody’s daughter
somebody’s son
made in God’s image,
meant to have life

right now while we sit in this place
bellies full
hearts united
safe in the harbor
somebody’s daughter, somebody’s son is being ripped from their home
and straight into hell.

into the fire of abuse, of slavery, of darkness
where dignity is burned and stripped and stripped and burned
where the human heart is made to believe it’s only value is to keep its battered body alive.

to be used.
to be raped.
to be tortured.
to be drugged.
to be bought.
to be sold.
to be used.
to be used.
to be used.

they are somebody’s daughter
somebody’s son
made in God’s image,
meant to have life.

stripped of power,
told not to tell.
stripped of dignity,
told that’s all they’re good for.
stripped of life
told this is how it is.
stripped of their voice,
told no one cares.

they are somebody’s daughter
somebody’s son
made in God’s image,
meant to have life.

it’s easy to think there’s nothing we can do.
it’s over there.
it’s out of my reach.
our little voice won’t make a difference.
our little money won’t change a thing.
our  little life can’t really help.

but you see,
it’s not just somebody’s daughter, somebody’s son.

it’s your daughter, your son.
your son, your daughter,
my daughter, my son
my son, my daughter
our daughters, our sons
made in God’s image,
meant to have life.

they are us.
and we are them.
bound together as God’s creation.

yeah,
when i was 14 and i was used,  you were used.
and when you–my beautiful-precious-valuable-born-with-God’s-dignity-deep-inside brothers-and-sisters were used. i was used.
and when our other beautiful precious valuable born-with-God’s-dignity-deep-inside brothers and sisters around the world are used,
we are used.

i’m tired of seeing people being used.
i’m sick and tired and tired and sick of seeing people be used.

yeah, it’s time.
to work for freedom.
to give a rip.
to do our part.
to fight for life.
to use our voice.
to move our feet.
to advocate for the voiceless
to give power to the weak

to ask Jesus–the one who sees, the one who knows, the one who cares–to show us, show me
stir us, stir me
move us, move me
remind us, remind me

that it’s somebody’s daughter, somebody’s son
our daughter, our sons, our sons, our daughters,
made in God’s image, meant for life.

my prayer and hope is that in any way we can we do part to advocate for our daughters, our sons here & abroad. they are made in God’s image,  meant for life.

i hope you are having a good summer so far. it’s my favorite time of year.

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ps: check out oasis’ traffik free communities initiative. it is focused on community collaboration across public and private agencies & faith communities & everyday ordinary citizens to eradicate trafficking from their city.

ppss:  because i’m so behind, i don’t think i ever shared this uncharacteristically-short post i wrote for communitas collective–a place to practice. i also wrote this little piece for the refuge blog on our annual camping trip & why i think it’s the best form of church.