back from a break & breaking old patterns.

kathyescobar blog, faith shifts, healing, the refuge 1 Comment

It’s been 3 months since I’ve blogged here, and I’m glad to get back in the groove this month (I miss rambling about things I like to ramble about–church, life, community, healing, faith shifts, justice, and equality!) I am not sure what things will look like exactly in this next season, blogging here for any and all things and also sharing over at Patheos Progressive Christian Channel on the realities of faith shifts.

For now, I’m not going to worry about it too much and just share when and how it comes.

Here’s a very brief catch up after 3 months:

I had a truly wonderful summer with friends and family. The Refuge, the Christian community and mission center I help pastor, is in a sweet place with all kinds of loveliness happening during this next season of our story. Even though it’s always hard and messy work, it’s a gift to be part of this community; the stories and relationships and glimpses of beauty in the ugly definitely keep me going after 11 years.

Our 5 children were all home at some point this summer, keeping my husband and I busy (and extra happy). We have three adult children now living in different states. With the twins now seniors in high school this is it for us–our last year before we are empty nesters. We are soaking in every bit of goodness we can with them because we know how fast time goes.

We wake-surfed, water skied, and taught a bunch of people of all ages and life experiences how to get up on boards and skis, and here’s what I know to be true–water heals. This week marks the close of the 2017 season, and I can feel the loss of that part of my week after a whole summer of surfing my guts out. However, I also know May 1st will be here before we know it.

In the midst of the goodness of summer there were a lot of hard things, too.

The ongoing onslaught of this political administration has been pretty rough, not only on my soul but a lot of my friends’ too. I am glad to be part of a lovely group that is helping me and others Survive This Presidency but most days I feel like I’m living in an alternative reality even though it’s all real. Charlottesville rocked us all this summer, too. I am glad to see so many continuing to resist, persist, and stand alongside the marginalized, and there’s no question we desperately need deep and meaningful change in our country, our systems, our cities, our churches, our hearts.

Life in a healing community and mission center is pretty bumpy, too, and some days it’s almost comical, having to split between taking care of kids, Refuge logistics, day to day realities, and walking alongside people in really brutal life situations. If there was a video camera recording it all, I guarantee you’d laugh, you’d cry, you’d cringe, and you’d say WTF?  

I do all of those, often.

Lastly, I spent the summer re-engaging with the 12 Steps and the Beatitudes as a path of spiritual and personal transformation at Freedom Summer Camp, our Sunday night format for summer at The Refuge. It was fun and healing for me on many levels. I have been working my own healing and recovery for over 20 years now but I go through seasons where I need more work and focus on the never-ending work of healing from codependency.  All I can say is argh, ugh, and a short list of choice swear words.

Many have heard this definition of insanity (I recently read it’s the most over-used cliche of all time, but I love cliches): Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again expecting a different result. 

That’s me–a bit insane–and damn, it’s irritating, but I’m learning to break some of these chains in a new way and always have a new layer of codependent work to do. 

I remain ever-grateful for a community and amazing circle of friends where I can keep healing, growing, learning, and practicing a better way.

Today is just a catch up post, and I wanted to share some of what I’ve written during the break and a little on what’s ahead, too. I’ll look forward to being back this week with a post I’ve been working on in my head for a while: Life Shift: Finding our Way Forward When Things Change (and Change Again). 

Meanwhile, here’s some of what I shared on Patheos over the summer months after beginning to blog there in July.

Regular posts:

Plus, a 6 part series of the major movements of Faith Shift:

I took July and August off of SheLoves Magazine, but had a post for September, post-Charlottesville:  It’s Easier to Do Than Listen. 

Lastly, I have a few fun events coming this fall that I am really excited about. I’m teaching a 6 week class at a transitional housing facility near me centered on Healthy Relationships. It makes my heart happy! Also, i’ll be sharing at Asbury Theological Seminary in Kentucky next week at their Holiness Week centered on recovery and healing, attending a National Association of Christian Recovery 11th step retreat in Texas in the middle of October, and facilitating 2 days of “Faith is a Verb” at The Well, an inclusive community in Jacksonville (plus a fun Faith Shift gathering in town, too. I’ll share details on that once I have it).

I’ll miss summer, but this fall is pretty fun.

As always, thanks for reading and being here. 

It’s always good to be back.