rebuilding is possible: a little hope for deconstruction
when i originally had this idea for a rebuilding after deconstructing series, i didn’t know exactly what it would be like. i just knew i wanted to write what was on my heart and see what happened. i have so appreciated all of the comments & honesty & the lovely new people i have met during this past few weeks and connecting with so many of you who have been here for a long time, too. thanks for being part of the carnival. it’s a privilege to intersect with such brave, wise, and honest people–in real life & online, too.
as we wrap up, i wanted to put all of the links for the series in one place, so here they are:
- rebuilding after deconstructing (intro)
- 1. honoring the process
- 2. acknowledging losses
- 3. discovering what remains
- 4. finding what works
- 5. celebrating what was
- 6. igniting passion
- 7. exploring possibilities
- 8. trusting the path
- helpful & oh-not-so-helpful things people say during deconstruction
- soul care & spiritual practices for deconstruction
- i used to…but now i…
also, i would love some feedback on areas you’d like to continue to explore related to this topic. there are a couple i already know of in the works: what about the kids? what happens when spouses are in different places completely? how can we find safe community in new ways?
what else would you like to process here? let me know in the comments section.
another question is “now what” for some of you who would like to keep processing through the journey with others who understand in a safe place. there are all kinds of great things online related to faith shifts & if you have any sites you want to recommend, please do. related specifically to this conversation, jim fisher started a closed facebook group called “faith under construction” that will be exploring some of these ideas & more online. if you have some pretty big church wounds and think some extra processing might be helpful, maybe you can consider joining our next online walking wounded: hope for those hurt by the church group, hosted at live it to the full (we don’t have an exact date right now but you can email me and i’ll let you know when we get it set). another great site for those healing from church woundedness is www.churchburned.com, hosted by my friend travis klaussen.
lastly, i thought i’d post a few links to old posts that many of you may not have read before that are centered on this topic. remember my disclaimer: i am a work in progress and please don’t hold me to everything i’ve said here over the years. i haven’t re-read all of these in detail, but i hope that somehow, someway, anything shared here can bring a little bit of hope on this wild & crazy path of rebuilding after deconstruction.
these are the ones that jumped out at me as i looked back (just some light reading, ha ha):
- surviving spiritual vertigo - tips for grieving the shift
- jenga faith - our faith is stronger than we might think
- kids & faith: what are we creating? - what happens to the kids when we start slipping off the slope
- we’re in good company - mother teresa had some pretty serious doubts, too.
- doubt & faith series: doubt & faith: the wild beautiful ride, doubt & faith: owning our egocentric tendencies, doubt & faith: new ways for old words, doubt & faith – God, you out there?, doubt & faith - living in the tension
- praying when you can’t find your prayer beads or have taken the word “quiet time” out of your vocabulary - prayer practices
- a nifty chart for the journey: stages in the life of faith - the original post about the stages of faith chart
- what’s your score: a walking wounded quiz - we used this way back in 2007, makes me laugh every time.
- what’s inside the bunny? – rethinking spiritual maturity and unlearning church things that leave us hollow
- home - the reality of spiritual and emotional homelessness
- practical theology – where is God in my real life?
- serenity & courage – the serenity prayer is so healing! a little exercise to remember what we can change & what we can’t
- actually, the grass is greener - yes, it sure is even though they told me it wasn’t.
- church refugee video series: church refugees – part 1, church refugees – part 2, life outside the bubble, church refugees – part 3, spiritual practices
- rethinking the word christian video series - wrestling with the word “christian”, taking things off the table to get to what’s underneath, going back because there’s nowhere else to go
- paradox - accepting parts of ourselves & others & God that are contradictory
- letting God off the hook - when i stopped blaming God for everything
- a time to – this might be a helpful exercise, it was for me.
- yep, i guess i’m a heretic – i’m thinking some of you are, too.
- linear, never was never will be – some thoughts on hope for change
have a great weekend! peace and courage, kathy
on monday (yeah, i haven’t had a rant in a while): reframing crazy when it comes to church