Comments on: waiting, hoping, expecting the wrong things http://kathyescobar.com/2009/12/08/waiting-hoping-expecting-the-wrong-things/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=waiting-hoping-expecting-the-wrong-things Mon, 21 May 2012 14:57:19 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.2 By: kathyescobar http://kathyescobar.com/2009/12/08/waiting-hoping-expecting-the-wrong-things/#comment-3087 kathyescobar Tue, 22 Dec 2009 20:32:36 +0000 http://kathyescobar.com/?p=2550#comment-3087 donna - oh how i love you and am glad that we share the journey from afar. yeah, i am glad God's God and i'm not. so hard. but even a smidgen of connection with the reality of pain and suffering up-close-and-personal does do something to our hearts. and no doubt, i do think that tasting the pain helps taste the sweet somehow...xo donna – oh how i love you and am glad that we share the journey from afar. yeah, i am glad God’s God and i’m not. so hard. but even a smidgen of connection with the reality of pain and suffering up-close-and-personal does do something to our hearts. and no doubt, i do think that tasting the pain helps taste the sweet somehow…xo

   0 likes

]]> By: DonnaV http://kathyescobar.com/2009/12/08/waiting-hoping-expecting-the-wrong-things/#comment-3086 DonnaV Mon, 21 Dec 2009 15:08:52 +0000 http://kathyescobar.com/?p=2550#comment-3086 Hey Kathy..... I love you. A long time ago I used to pray to see and feel things as God saw and felt them... as the pain in my heart grew I knew that I couldn't survive long with that prayer and dropped it. I've been thinking about you a lot these last couple of weeks and was reminded of that prayer. Maybe I'm way off but I think that the anger and frustration you (we) feel when we see the distortion & misrepresentation of God is a smidgen of what God feels. I don't think our hearts were made to hold so much hurt but maybe a touch of that hurt makes the love we have that much sweeter to those of our community. I love that you can find the words to write and share this great big heart of yours... I hate that it knows pain but it helps me knowing I'm not alone. Donna Hey Kathy….. I love you.
A long time ago I used to pray to see and feel things as God saw and felt them… as the pain in my heart grew I knew that I couldn’t survive long with that prayer and dropped it. I’ve been thinking about you a lot these last couple of weeks and was reminded of that prayer. Maybe I’m way off but I think that the anger and frustration you (we) feel when we see the distortion & misrepresentation of God is a smidgen of what God feels. I don’t think our hearts were made to hold so much hurt but maybe a touch of that hurt makes the love we have that much sweeter to those of our community.
I love that you can find the words to write and share this great big heart of yours… I hate that it knows pain but it helps me knowing I’m not alone.
Donna

   0 likes

]]> By: kathyescobar http://kathyescobar.com/2009/12/08/waiting-hoping-expecting-the-wrong-things/#comment-3080 kathyescobar Fri, 18 Dec 2009 22:44:42 +0000 http://kathyescobar.com/?p=2550#comment-3080 minnow & keith, somehow i missed you guys when i responded, sorry! <strong>minnow</strong> - yeah, i am glad you clarified. it's funny how we all have our little triggers and how powerful they are. i know the feeling. thanks for your honesty. <strong>keith </strong>- no need to ask for forgiveness, i know it's a rough time for so many at the refuge right now. not the merriest-time-of-year. we miss seeing you though and glad you could come to joshua station last night. hope we can celebrate on january 2nd, a new year. thanks for sharing minnow & keith, somehow i missed you guys when i responded, sorry!

minnow – yeah, i am glad you clarified. it’s funny how we all have our little triggers and how powerful they are. i know the feeling. thanks for your honesty.

keith - no need to ask for forgiveness, i know it’s a rough time for so many at the refuge right now. not the merriest-time-of-year. we miss seeing you though and glad you could come to joshua station last night. hope we can celebrate on january 2nd, a new year. thanks for sharing

   0 likes

]]> By: kathyescobar http://kathyescobar.com/2009/12/08/waiting-hoping-expecting-the-wrong-things/#comment-3076 kathyescobar Fri, 18 Dec 2009 18:04:30 +0000 http://kathyescobar.com/?p=2550#comment-3076 sorry for the delayed response. been down with a nasty cold, argh! <strong>stacy</strong> - thanks my hopeful friend and your sweet words and faithful presence mean more than you know. no more internet surfing, hahha. keep helping me see what is right before me. <strong>sam</strong> - i know, i know, i know. it is just plain dumb to even "go there". i know what i will see and et it and it is always bad for the soul. no more, i am working on my sobriety... i do so agree with you how disparate and messed up the system is. i do not want to lose sight ever of how inconsistent some of our decisions corporately are and how disconnected from real life the church can get. i think the real change that will continue to happen is when more and more people's hearts are stirred up to love in really tangible ways and refuse to participate in a system that is disconnected from real life. thanks as always for sharing. <strong>ginger</strong> - thanks for posting & for your beautiful words. i especially liked what you said here: "the real church is present in the middle of what looks like Christianity." <strong>randi</strong>- thanks for your thoughts. i have felt so encouraged in this past week, sometimes just saying it is enough for me (i think you might be able to relate). i really like what you said: "the world judges spiritual health by so many things other than spiritual health." i do agree, what we call "mature" is usually related to education, bible knowledge, put-together-ness, and not relational ,in-the-trenches-with-hurting-people kinds of things. interesting, eh? <strong>mark</strong> - yes, my friend, the kingdom is here. i see it a lot. and i know you do, too. <strong>joy</strong> - oh thanks for sharing and yes it is beautiful to see what continues to emerge in you...i think the anger is a way through. i love your heart, your passion, and am with you on learning to embrace the mystery and just go along for the ride and enjoy it instead of kicking and fighting it. <strong>laurie</strong> - oh i always love to hear from you. yeah, once you taste the things from below, we can never go back. i am not in typical church very often but once in a while i am and i am always so reminded of how "weird" it is feels. how can we help with food & bibles? send a link so i can pass on. love & hope to you in the trenches. <strong>christine</strong> - thanks for the invite. it's always fun to be part. sorry for the delayed response. been down with a nasty cold, argh!

stacy – thanks my hopeful friend and your sweet words and faithful presence mean more than you know. no more internet surfing, hahha. keep helping me see what is right before me.

sam – i know, i know, i know. it is just plain dumb to even “go there”. i know what i will see and et it and it is always bad for the soul. no more, i am working on my sobriety… i do so agree with you how disparate and messed up the system is. i do not want to lose sight ever of how inconsistent some of our decisions corporately are and how disconnected from real life the church can get. i think the real change that will continue to happen is when more and more people’s hearts are stirred up to love in really tangible ways and refuse to participate in a system that is disconnected from real life. thanks as always for sharing.

ginger – thanks for posting & for your beautiful words. i especially liked what you said here: “the real church is present in the middle of what looks like Christianity.”

randi- thanks for your thoughts. i have felt so encouraged in this past week, sometimes just saying it is enough for me (i think you might be able to relate). i really like what you said: “the world judges spiritual health by so many things other than spiritual health.” i do agree, what we call “mature” is usually related to education, bible knowledge, put-together-ness, and not relational ,in-the-trenches-with-hurting-people kinds of things. interesting, eh?

mark – yes, my friend, the kingdom is here. i see it a lot. and i know you do, too.

joy – oh thanks for sharing and yes it is beautiful to see what continues to emerge in you…i think the anger is a way through. i love your heart, your passion, and am with you on learning to embrace the mystery and just go along for the ride and enjoy it instead of kicking and fighting it.

laurie – oh i always love to hear from you. yeah, once you taste the things from below, we can never go back. i am not in typical church very often but once in a while i am and i am always so reminded of how “weird” it is feels. how can we help with food & bibles? send a link so i can pass on. love & hope to you in the trenches.

christine – thanks for the invite. it’s always fun to be part.

   0 likes

]]> By: The Least Likely – And Advent Reflection by Kathy Escobar « Godspace http://kathyescobar.com/2009/12/08/waiting-hoping-expecting-the-wrong-things/#comment-3073 The Least Likely – And Advent Reflection by Kathy Escobar « Godspace Fri, 18 Dec 2009 15:58:51 +0000 http://kathyescobar.com/?p=2550#comment-3073 [...] at The Carnival in My Head where she has written another very powerful Advent reflection – Waiting, Hoping, Expecting the Wrong Things. Kathy is also part of The Refuge in Broomfield near Denver Colorado.  Check out their blog too. [...] [...] at The Carnival in My Head where she has written another very powerful Advent reflection – Waiting, Hoping, Expecting the Wrong Things. Kathy is also part of The Refuge in Broomfield near Denver Colorado.  Check out their blog too. [...]

   0 likes

]]> By: Laurie http://kathyescobar.com/2009/12/08/waiting-hoping-expecting-the-wrong-things/#comment-3072 Laurie Fri, 18 Dec 2009 14:18:15 +0000 http://kathyescobar.com/?p=2550#comment-3072 Kathy, a great post from a woman's heart. I am in the US for a little while to finish up closing on my house so I can get back to H. I get distracted by the number of amplifiers in our assembly room in my Mega Church in the US. Or the need for air conditioning in December in case we get stuffy. In the main church I attend in H, we have air conditioning courtesy of unfinished walls that no one as money to fix. And no need for fancy lighting as we have a few bulbs hanging from wires from the tin ceiling. I miss that church b/c we have faith, worship and an experience with God, even if the pews are unfinished wooden benches, and the parking lot is gravel and stones. In two different churches of widely different methodology I heard virtually the same sermon two weeks in a row lately. The Kingdom is not here yet in its fullness. But it's coming. And we may be surprised at the reversals that God will institute when the Kingdom is truly a reality. Keep going against the flow Kathy because you are storing treasures in heaven, not soundspeakers and fancy parking lots on earth. In the meantime I am believing God for two things I am asked for most in Honduras: food and Bibles. Kathy, a great post from a woman’s heart. I am in the US for a little while to finish up closing on my house so I can get back to H. I get distracted by the number of amplifiers in our assembly room in my Mega Church in the US. Or the need for air conditioning in December in case we get stuffy. In the main church I attend in H, we have air conditioning courtesy of unfinished walls that no one as money to fix. And no need for fancy lighting as we have a few bulbs hanging from wires from the tin ceiling. I miss that church b/c we have faith, worship and an experience with God, even if the pews are unfinished wooden benches, and the parking lot is gravel and stones. In two different churches of widely different methodology I heard virtually the same sermon two weeks in a row lately. The Kingdom is not here yet in its fullness. But it’s coming. And we may be surprised at the reversals that God will institute when the Kingdom is truly a reality. Keep going against the flow Kathy because you are storing treasures in heaven, not soundspeakers and fancy parking lots on earth. In the meantime I am believing God for two things I am asked for most in Honduras: food and Bibles.

   0 likes

]]> By: Joy http://kathyescobar.com/2009/12/08/waiting-hoping-expecting-the-wrong-things/#comment-3067 Joy Tue, 15 Dec 2009 19:55:56 +0000 http://kathyescobar.com/?p=2550#comment-3067 Kathy. I have been struggling with my own feelings in this same regard. I was excited about advent...hoping once again that the 'experience' or the process would somehow magically recapture the old feelings I once had back in my Mega church days...I too find myself waiting for alot of the wrong things...instead of just 'being' in the moment...being where I am. It's those pesky 'expectations' that limit possibilities for something other...I think I have too many 'old' expectations. I really set out to be 'joyful' this advent...thinking I had come so far since last year...but...the feeling that seems to be the most overwhelming in my life this year is sadness. I am on the verge of tears all the time...Maybe that's better than this time last year when it seems I was mostly feeling the need to seriously hurt someone...I had so much anger! However, I still have hope that all of this ...my life...and my current experiences with my wonderful new community etc...arenot just a 'loss cause' but instead part of the mystery of God working in my life. Kathy. I have been struggling with my own feelings in this same regard. I was excited about advent…hoping once again that the ‘experience’ or the process would somehow magically recapture the old feelings I once had back in my Mega church days…I too find myself waiting for alot of the wrong things…instead of just ‘being’ in the moment…being where I am.
It’s those pesky ‘expectations’ that limit possibilities for something other…I think I have too many ‘old’ expectations.
I really set out to be ‘joyful’ this advent…thinking I had come so far since last year…but…the feeling that seems to be the most overwhelming in my life this year is sadness. I am on the verge of tears all the time…Maybe that’s better than this time last year when it seems I was mostly feeling the need to seriously hurt someone…I had so much anger!
However, I still have hope that all of this …my life…and my current experiences with my wonderful new community etc…arenot just a ‘loss cause’ but instead part of the mystery of God working in my life.

   0 likes

]]> By: Mark R http://kathyescobar.com/2009/12/08/waiting-hoping-expecting-the-wrong-things/#comment-3066 Mark R Tue, 15 Dec 2009 12:29:28 +0000 http://kathyescobar.com/?p=2550#comment-3066 A lot of people missed the first Advent, a few got to see it but most missed it. Rome was doing it's thing, religion didn't want to know and I'm thinking ... the dominant culture still don't want to know and religion don't want the Kingdom messing with it's thing. He went about saying - change your ways of thinking the Kingdom is here. A lot of people missed the first Advent, a few got to see it but most missed it. Rome was doing it’s thing, religion didn’t want to know and I’m thinking …

the dominant culture still don’t want to know and religion don’t want the Kingdom messing with it’s thing.

He went about saying – change your ways of thinking the Kingdom is here.

   0 likes

]]> By: Keith Broadbent http://kathyescobar.com/2009/12/08/waiting-hoping-expecting-the-wrong-things/#comment-3064 Keith Broadbent Mon, 14 Dec 2009 19:52:16 +0000 http://kathyescobar.com/?p=2550#comment-3064 I always struggle at Christmas time; too many expected disappointments. I am always grateful that it ends on Jan 2, my birthday. I can't bear the thought of advent. Please forgive me and I will return to "normal" after then. Great post by the way. Sometimes I think you should just write. I always struggle at Christmas time; too many expected disappointments. I am always grateful that it ends on Jan 2, my birthday. I can’t bear the thought of advent. Please forgive me and I will return to “normal” after then. Great post by the way. Sometimes I think you should just write.

   0 likes

]]> By: minnow http://kathyescobar.com/2009/12/08/waiting-hoping-expecting-the-wrong-things/#comment-3059 minnow Fri, 11 Dec 2009 11:26:25 +0000 http://kathyescobar.com/?p=2550#comment-3059 Mark--I hope you understood that I was not saying you were saying what I heard. The tapes I keep hauling around with me from some very old and ready for the burn pile thinking get triggered every now and then and well, I respond. Randi--"the world judges spiritual health by so many things other than spiritual health." That'll preach!! Mark–I hope you understood that I was not saying you were saying what I heard. The tapes I keep hauling around with me from some very old and ready for the burn pile thinking get triggered every now and then and well, I respond.

Randi–”the world judges spiritual health by so many things other than spiritual health.” That’ll preach!!

   0 likes

]]>